Sunday, 1 August 2010

Time after Time

Luscious and scrumptious tasting ingredients... flour,sugar, milk and eggs seem easy enough a combination....placed into the 'hearth' to rise and bake..

What happens when the oven door opens too soon and the cake is not ready....not fully baked...yet so tempting and seducing with it's lingering aroma. When what you think is fate seems, to have arrived too early....being not quite there yet ?! Or maybe it will never be what it might have been intended to become. Wondering why, is a waste of time, it's something that becomes apparent after endless sleepless nights and plenty of circles on the roundabout. Sometimes timing just ain't right. It's as simple as that. Sometimes a point of no return put you there, in the middle of uncertainty. Left to ponder and explore.

Wondering.....why...and why not. Over and over again. Some things need time, to adjust, to entwine, and to connect, just rightly. Just like the cake. No use pushing it. Patience becomes a true virtue in these cases, for there is not a single certainty to this real life open ended recipe.

So time after time, desperately trying to find the right button to press, thinking I may have found it and realising that even though I seem to hit some home truths, I cannot get to what lies beyond them....that, which is safely tucked away, in a comfort zone for fears to reign.

When truths are untold or left out, time has a way of resurfacing them, at exactly the right moment, does the same thing happen with fate....does it fall into place at exactly the right instant ?!  Will time ensure the proper outcome of it?!

And how does the concept of 'wasted time' fit into long do you 'take your time' ?! Is time endless and unwinding ?! Does time also need distance to evolve and grow...

When we find ourselves in this 'lost zone', a 'black hole' as it were, filled with endless possibilities, yet yearning for our wish to come we stare into the darkness hoping to see what we so hope to see, only to find that in the end, life throws you in an unexpected twirl....?! Are we constantly grasping at straws ?! Or is there a way to make happen, what we so want to make happen.

A good cake is made from an 'old recipe' one that has been sampled over and over again, all the ingredients blending into a fantastic flavour, one that is so tasty, that it will make us want to make the cake again, and again. Is this too needed in relationships, the right ingredients at exactly the right time....Ensuring taste and structure ?! It seems logical enough.

A year ago, my ingredients were finally assigned to me ....and I combined them with someone else's hoping to bake a fabulous cake together, but everytime I stare into the oven and see, that to this day, the smell is wonderful, it looks fantastic and tastes close to perfect, but something seems to have gone wrong with the structure of it all....and neither of us seems capable of 'fixing' it....we keep leaving it mushy and nearly done...each choosing a different and new mix elsewhere, thinking that will make us the cake we think we want...but will it !?!

I guess maybe, once time and distance get a chance to work it out, the cake may possibly have fully baked to perfection....fate remains... and only time will tell.

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